WIDDERSHINS DAY REVIEW
Roach Harbor Whig Throckmorton Wheeze
Spigotoon Point was crowded with holiday makers converging on this outskirt of Roach Harbor for a glimpse of the Homefleet's famous annual Review. The weather was perfect-warm, clear, golden and festively breezy. The Naval Bands regaled the crowd with shanties and hornpipes while happy children in sailor suits flew kites over the beach in mock aerial battles, or splashed about in the surf with toy sailboats.
The great old Admiral Jellyroll made a delightfully rousing patriotic speech praising recent reforms in sailor's welfare, dedication of our good officers and the qualities and great improvements in Naval Affairs over the past three decades, and he further welcomed the Government's decision to prioritize all big gun dreadnoughts in the coming decade. Then the Grand Old Hero assisted by a glowing young boy of the crowd touched off a firecracker that signaled a massive volley by the fleet. It's Thunderous Din shook windows throughout the whole precinct!
It is perfectly obvious to this writer that so long as our walls of steel are manned by heroes such as Jellyroll, the bakers, farmers, bankers and paper workers, the industrious dressmakers and smiling children of the Polyester Freestate will always be able to sleep well at night.
I must remark upon the veritable castle of steel that is HMS Polyesterdelphia, now out of dry-dock and undergoing her fresh first sea trial, she was festive in pennants and flags. The Anarchist's bomb that sheared her rudder but could not sink her has left no scars. I am given to understand she takes to sea with a treble reinforced bow allowing her to break ice in the rimward latitudes, or ram torpedos or submarine boats with impunity.
Of course the marvelous submarine boat S-15, called by her crew the Sea Sow, is one of the stars of the Review. and spent the day braving the spray of great ships giving giggling girls and happy boys short tours and quick rides about the harbor. It is held by her crew that a single motor torpedo can sink even a dreadnought, heaven forbid such infernal machines be used in earnest!
The day drew to a close as the Homefleet steamed out to sea to begin a month of maneuvers, piped into the main with the calls of the gulls the fluttering of kerchiefs by adoring pink cheeked girls and the freshening salt breeze. In the redding rays of the sinking sun the mastheads disappeared beyond the horizon I took note of a grizzy old salt nearby. With his one good hand he wiped a sparkling tear from his eye and allowed "as how it was good to see they still kept the brass shipshape on the old City of Soup-pot" and taking on a crooked grin, "Served on 'er, man an' boy I did, unner good ol' Cap'n Squallshorts hisself, 'e it was as bound up this missing yard, taken by a big ol shell at the siege of Gabapolotl... 'E bound it up with a sleeve torn from 'is very own coat, and winked and sez how he don't need it nohow as he had no arm t'port for to wear it on hissown self..."
The Siege of Gabapolotl and the first Chocolotl War and the old one armed Captain Squallshorts are history now, gone down to the home of all fine old things, but the fleet carries on their proud service tradition, and the Sun can never set on the Freestate so long as such stout courage and fine steel encastle us.
|The Fleet holds it's annual Widdershins day Review in Testorton|
Old heavy cruiser Pigbelly Bottom, with the band on deck.
|The great Carrier; Arthrodire. with a deck of new fighter aeroplanes!|
|Sub SB-15 with brave captain Sogjodper|
|The fleet on maneuvers, with destroyer escorts|
|The grand battleship Polyesterdelphia|